Handling Self-Degradation and Negative Thoughts

It’s hard to push through the day when your mind is telling you to stay in bed and sleep away the responsibility and stress of life. I want you to know you’re not alone, and you are more than that small, negative voice in the back of your head.

I’ll be honest – There have been days where I just don’t want to get out of bed. I feel emotionally, mentally and physically drained, the weight of responsibility pressing so hard into my chest, it practically caves in.

Sometimes, I will lay there, looking out my window, wondering, What if I didn’t exist? My brain spirals, going off on a tangent of how different lives and things would be impacted if I were to suddenly disappear or, worse, die. The scariest part of that thought is the piece of me that says, Nothing would change, as if my presence on this planet doesn’t matter.

I’m not sure what it is that pulls me out of this fog of feeling unneeded and unwanted. Responsibility – yes – but something else too, a string tied to my heart. I took some time today to analyze that string. I asked it what or who it was that got me out of bed. The short answer was me. I got myself out of bed. I willed myself forward. Sure, there were a million and one expectations tugging at me, but I am the one who ended up saying, Okay. Another day.

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This small belief in myself is what made me want to write this post. Some of us, I believe, are too dependent on others to be the ones to get us out of bed every day. There is nothing wrong with a support system. In fact, I encourage it. However, I do believe that you should live your life for you. When you live your life for others, you will find yourself on a road of resentment of “what could have been”. That’s the last thing I would want for myself, and so I know it is likely what you don’t want either.

If you are someone, like me, who often questions if you would be missed if you disappeared, know that the short answer is yes, and the long answer is you are worth more than you think. This kind of self-encouragement is something I plan on implementing into my life thoroughly. I’m tired of doubting myself, my abilities to do good work, just because of that little voice in the back of my head that says, Stay in bed. You’re not needed today.

When you give in to that voice – and I know this from experience –  today turns into tomorrow and tomorrow into a week. That little voice is nothing but what is left of your negative mindset. It may not ever fully dissolve, but it can get quieter with practice and determination. There are a few things that I have found really help me get it to shut up:

  1. Read something to take your mind off of your mind.
  2. Call a family member or friend and chat for a few minutes. Having a conversation with someone else will remind you that there are people who like to have a conversation with you.
  3. Without thinking about it, get up and exercise. Do some crunches or, better, go outside for a run. I find that being outside, breathing in the fresh air into my lungs, reminds me I am alive.
  4. Take a luxurious bath. For me, this means a bubble bath with my laptop set up on my toilet with Netflix on, a glass of wine, and a bag of chocolates. I usually put in some Epsom salts to help detoxify any stress I have. I simply let myself zone out, turn off my brain, and concentrate only on the movie or show on my laptop screen.
  5.  Do some writing. This is my favorite for obvious reasons. Not everyone will like this method, but I find dumping my thoughts onto paper – or even concocting the blog post you are reading now – are great methods for getting out of my head, or at least coming to a solution as to why I feel the way I feel.
  6. Go shopping. I have always been a little bit of a shopaholic, but that’s because I find browsing through clothing to be extremely therapeutic. It really just allows me to let loose, focus on cute clothes, and just be free for a couple of hours from work and anxiety.

All six of these things have helped me. They aren’t permanent fixes, by any means, but they have made a positive impact on my life, whenever I feel down on myself. I would love to hear from you guys on maybe something you do to help take your mind off of negative thinking. I believe the key is to simply do something. Don’t sit around and wallow, because you will only dig yourself into a deeper, darker trench of negativity. Positivity and happiness are a lifestyle. They only come naturally if you have the willingness to be you, wholeheartedly, and be okay with that.

None of us are perfect. I know I sure as hell am not. However, we are presented with two ways of thinking: (1) we could sit around and think about why we aren’t perfect or are unneeded, or (2) we could choose to move forward, ignore the negative voice, and remember it is a small piece of the whole package we have to offer to the world. For me, I have been making more of an effort to fall into the second mindset. I want to be empowered, successful, and – above all – happy. Sitting within my darkness or staying in bed all day does absolutely nothing for me.

I implore you to take steps today to be a better you by ignoring that little negative voice. That voice is nothing compared to who you are and who you can be. All you must do is be active in your own life. Be a participant in your own journey. Thanks for reading, and please be sure to give this post a share if you found it helpful.


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